Couples Counseling: When to go and What to Expect

Couples counselling is a form of therapy that helps couples navigate and resolve conflicts and improve their relationship. It is important to recognise the signs that indicate when it may be necessary for a couple to seek counselling. Your relationship doesn’t have to be in a serious predicament for relationship counselling to be needed. Understanding and solving the problem before it becomes severe is generally helpful.


You can read more about what couples counselling is here.


When to Seek Couples Counselling

Couples may experience a variety of challenges throughout the course of their relationship, such as changes in circumstances or the emergence of new issues. These challenges can test the strength of the relationship and may lead to feelings of dissatisfaction and disconnection.

Research has shown that the earlier couples seek counselling, the more likely they are to experience optimal / positive outcomes.


5 Signs You Need Relationship Counselling Melbourne:

1. Difficulty communicating effectively

Couples may experience difficulty communicating their needs and feelings, leading to misunderstandings and conflicts. Communication and understanding each others’ point of view is key in a relationship.

2. Constant arguing

While occasional disagreements are a normal part of any relationship, constant arguing can be detrimental to the relationship and lead to feelings of contempt and disconnection.

3. Lack of trust

Trust is a fundamental aspect of any relationships. If trust has been broken, couples may experience difficulty rebuilding it and may benefit from counselling to address the issue.

4. Recurrent patterns of dysfunction

This includes repeated conflicts or power struggles. Counselling can help couples identify and address these patterns in order to improve the relationship.

5. Feelings of disconnection

Couples may experience feelings of disconnection without being able to identify the underlying cause. Counselling can help couples gain insights into the dynamics of their relationship and address any issues.



Types of Relationship Counselling:

There are various approaches to couples counselling which include:

  1. Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT), helps individuals develop psychological flexibility and focus on values-based actions to improve their situation. The book “ACT with Love” discusses many aspects of how these skills can be implemented.

  2. Cognitive Behaviour Therapy (CBT), aims to change unhelpful patterns of thinking and behaviour

  3. Emotionally Focused Couples Counselling (EFCC),  helps couples to identify and express their emotions in a healthy way, and to create a deeper connection and a more secure bond.

  4. The Gottman Method, research-based approach to relationship counselling that focuses on improving communication, managing conflicts, and building a strong and lasting relationship by increasing emotional connection and intimacy.

  5. Solution-Focused Couples Counselling, identifies and reinforces positive aspects of a relationship, setting clear goals and finding solutions to problems instead of focusing on the past.

Depending on your needs and challenges, your therapist will discuss with you which approach(es) may be more suitable.



Couples counselling can be a beneficial tool for couples experiencing difficulties in their relationship. By seeking counselling at the earliest sign of distress and working with a qualified psychologist / therapist, couples can improve their relationship and achieve greater satisfaction.

You can contact us and speak to our Client Support Team if you would like to find out more how this works, and to find a suitable therapist.

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